A Gift Horse

Psalms 37:4 “Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

This post is a continuation of “Dead Battery” from yesterday.

It is early October 2013 and Field Trial season is upon us. Field Trials being a competitive season where (in my case) pointing dogs are run on horseback to see which will find birds with the most style, grace, and perfect obedience. For me, it is my current favorite past time.

Last year my dog and I competed on my horse Zip. He is an awesome paint horse perfect for the trail, but for field trials which are done for hours at a time at a faster than walking pace… Zip is not so good. Being ungaited riding him for hours will literally beat your brains in, and a sore back is standard. Most competitors… or should I say ALL the competitors ride gaited horses like Tennessee Walkers or Missouri Fox Trotter’s. Gaited being the way they move, and that movement being smooth and not bouncy like my Paint horse. But to get a field trial proven horse can be moderately expensive. A decent horse starts at about $3500, and it was my goal to have saved for one over the last year. But that didn't work out.

And so Saturday morning I was on my way to my friends 25 acre farm to train my dog Remi, and as I went I was thinking about the two batteries I just put in my truck, and my daughter’s wedding. I was praying, thanking God for the money for the batteries, and really thanking Him that He has a plan for the wedding, but I was also letting go of buying a horse, at least this year. In my mind I was saying there is no way I can get a horse before a wedding, and was really thinking about riding Zip again this season.

Mind you just a month ago my wife was online looking for me a horse. Her only pre-requisite was that she and her daughter both wanted me to get a horse colored blue roan. And she found a couple for $3500 but I never went to look at them for lack of a way to pay cash for them. I could have borrowed the money as horses can be financed, but that wouldn't be a God thing. 

But back to my story… And so after training Remi I was talking to my friend about his 4 horses. I said, "You know that old horse over there is a bad cribber? (Cribbing is when a horse chews on the fence) He said, “No kidding, you want him?”

I said, “You’re kidding right?”

He said, “No, I’m tired of him chewing on my fences. In fact, I’m taking him to Eureka, and hope we don’t come back with him.”

So I asked, “What’s wrong with him?”

My friends replied, “There is nothing “wrong” with him. Except he doesn't like men, because one beat him a long time ago.”

I said, “That’s not a problem.”

To which his wife said, “You won’t even be able to catch him.”

Well it took a while, but to everyone’s surprise I was able to catch him, and get a halter on him. Then we saddled him up, and I took my new FREE horse for a ride. And he did great. Smooth as silk.

Now to add some murmuration to the Gift Horse. The horses name is Huckleberry, but they call him Huck. Huck is was a nickname my Dad was called when I was a kid. And in case you are not aware of it, that color is blue roan. :-)

All I can say is. “Thank you God for loving me soooo much. You never cease to amaze me. How wonderful it is to get a gift that is beyond a need. I love You!”

This as much as anything has caused me to look back and see all the blessings, particularly in the last year. I haven't counted it all up, but I have seen at least $10,000 literally fall out of the sky. (Miraculous expression of God's love and miracle ability.)

I am not destitute, poor, broke, though I hope in spirit broken. My life is not any tougher than anyone elses, but rather a lot easier than 90% of the worlds populations. All of the struggles I write about are not to highlight the struggle, but to highlight God in them. Don't be jealous of me being given anything, and nor do I want you to hurt when I struggle. It is all God at work to bring me to the end of myself so that when I collapse in exhaustion I collapse into His arms. Any struggle is there so I can say to God, "I give up, I surrender, I can't do it, I have to rely on you."

Any blessing is not God saying to me that I have done good, or that I have earned anything, or lived a perfect life if momentarily, but it is there to say, "I love you in spite of yourself." And therefore it all is a blessing. The struggle and the gifts are blessings because God causes ALL THINGS to work together for good. I pray today that God would show you the truth of this, not in my words, but in your life.

Dead Battery

Deuteronomy 18:39, “You shall plant and cultivate vineyards, but you will neither drink of the wine nor gather the grapes, for the worm will devour them.”

To you ever feel like everything you do turns to crap? Or how about just when you are about to get ahead some problem arises that eats up the little bit of savings you managed to accumulate? Do you ever feel like your hard work is eaten by worms like the scripture above suggests?

Sometimes… even too often, I default into that mindset. After all, for the past eleven years I have accumulated no savings that has lasted. Not a big issue unless you consider my daughter is getting married in less than a year, and I would like to participate financially in her wedding. Or even beyond that there are plenty of fun things I would like to have or do. On my “Hopes and Dreams” list I have 10 places I would like to take my wife to along with some needed items and other materialistic things like a gaited horse.

But as I look at what is not I get a text from my wife that a $260 check arrived for me. It comes once a quarter, and is a dividend from an old investment. (thanks Mom) I quickly replied, “I’m going to save that for my daughter’s wedding.” Wow, God is awesome I thought.

The next morning I go to take my son to school and my truck won’t start. It has a dead battery. And being Diesel it has two dead batteries, not just one. Would anyone like to guess how much those batteries costs? If you said $260.00 you are dead on.

“Why must the worm always eat the blessing?” I cried out to God. “When am I going to get ahead?”

To which the Holy Spirit whispers, “I gave you the money for the batteries ahead of time instead of after, are you going to complain about that?”

There were no worms eating the blessing. There really was only God’s provision again, supplying a need. When will my stinking thinking change?

Maybe tomorrow… (to be continued)

Tree Falling in the Woods

Matthew 6:28…32 “And why are you worried... Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin… for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.”

There is a saying that if a tree falls in the woods and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? I say that if you have a problem and no one is there to see it, is there really a problem at all?

It hit me while driving in Houston traffic surrounded by literally hundreds of thousands of cars that I do not know a single problem of another individual driver. In fact, from my point of view, not a single driver has a single issue in their life other than they are in my way. So does it mean that because I can’t see their problem that one does not exists?

Then the other day I was inconvenienced by a funeral processions. I am sure that there were many grieving people in those cars with their headlights on, but I felt no grief at all. To me there was no loss, and therefore was there a loss at all?

When my brother-in-law died unexpectedly a year ago, my sister and our family hurt deeply, but my friends who did not know him felt no pain at all, so was my pain real?

When my business collapsed and there were both friends and family capable of stopping it, but they did nothing at all, was there even a collapse in the first place?

What fear these personal events brought to my mind. What would my sister do? How can I help raise her three kids? What would I do for a living? Would I be homeless? Will my children go hungry? All the worries of the problems… but wait, did they exist?

Mark Twain wrote, “I had a lot of problems, most of which never came to pass.”

My sister, my nephews, and my niece are more than surviving… they are thriving so was there ever really a problem to worry about. I have never been homeless, and based on my waist line never hungry either, so was there ever a problem with my business collapsing? Better yet, did it even collapse, or was God just opening a new chapter?

I have no idea what this thought process says about someone else’s problems, but what it says to me is that my problems truly do not exists outside the imagination of my mind. So many worries of yesterday, and yet today those worries are no more, only replaced by some self-consuming new fabrications.

Will I make my mortgage payment? I laugh realizing a hundred and twenty have already been made. Will I get a vacation? Will I be able to pay for my daughter’s wedding? Is all this worry killing me? Why is life so painful?

I am in the middle of what seems like the most beautiful discover of my life, and of kingdom vision and truth. The pain, the worry, the stress are all lies fabricated in my mind. God is in control.

Look at the cars on the freeway. We perceive no problems in the others because there really are no problems in the others. God is in control. Now imagine you are one of the others and you are looking at yourself. Do you now perceive a problem with yourself? You should not… because the problem does not exist. It does not exists because God is in control… working all things for good for those who love Him.

And then I read this from my friend Jim Spivey as the Holy Spirit confirms what He is doing in me. “There are a lot of very unsatisfied people running around pushing and grabbing at or avoiding each other, frantically searching for more or better circumstances.  They are completely identified with and by their pain, looking for some relief at any cost… “getting” won’t “solve the problem,” because… it’s all “inside us,” both our problem (us) and His Solution (being excavated)…   The Answer in Real Life, is in the relationship between the Father and Son.”

Today, if only for this moment I am pain and problem free. Father grant me the grace to live every moment in this truth in the name of Your Son Jesus.

I believe this is the perception of Christ. I believe this is where He was when He went to the cross. Focused on the joy of the truth, and not the illusion of pain.

Please watch this powerful video of God’s word being proven true again.

http://www.ted.com/talks/kelly_mcgonigal_how_to_make_stress_your_friend.html?source=facebook#.UkreBpVHdXl.facebook