Desperation

Jeremiah 17:7-10, “Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord and whose trust is the Lord. For he will be like a tree planted by the water, that extends its roots by the stream and will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit. The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it? I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind…”

“The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick.” What an indictment.

Here the prophet of old is quoting God as we are to be blessed if we not only trust in the Lord, but if we can be so trusting of Him that He is in fact our trust. That somehow we can not only trust Him to work everything together for good in faith, but that there is a place of blessing when we discover He is everything good, and outside of Him our trust, our hope, our desires are Him.

And yet standing in the way of this total trust is a deceitful heart. And yes we all have a heart that will try to deceive God, and that deceives even ourselves.

Life for me is in no way easy, but compared to even a year ago it has become much easier. And in that easing, comfort leads to complacency. Comfort somehow lulls the spirit into believing a deceitful heart. Oh that I would stay desperately hungry for God. That I could be honest with myself and see what God sees when He searches my heart.

Yes He loves me, and you. Yes He enjoys us, but there is also a place where He shows us our heart as He sees it, and He says once again… trust Me. Trust Me to lead you… trust Me to change you… trust Me that this is for your good.

A trust that seems to only comes sometimes from a holy desperation. A trust from knowing that “in Him we live, and move, and exist.” (Acts 17:28) And conversely without Him we do not exist, or live, or move. I welcome this holy desperation for I am desperate for Him.