Inadequate by design

2 Corinthians 12:9-10, “And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.’ Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.”

Yesterday I had the wonderful opportunity to attend a group we call Iwo Jima. I say wonderful because for the past 6 weeks something has always stood in the way of me getting together with the group.

For those that don’t know, Iwo Jima is a group of predominately men who universally are seeking God with all they can. Most are involved in ministry in some capacity. And so yesterday as the group opened up it became very clear that the theme, if there is such a thing, was centered on failure, and feeling inadequate. And why should men of God, ministers of the gospel not feel inadequate? After all, we know the truth… or at least think we do… but we also know ourselves, and if we are honest with ourselves then we also know we fail daily and are grossly inadequate in all our rolls.

One pastor shared his humbling struggles with his 11 year old daughter. Here is a man that like all good father’s wants to the best for his daughter and to be the best father. Forget the added pressure of having an audience in the form of a church congregation watching in what is often judgment. Another young man was faced with the reality that as a husband he is inadequate, and that his wife suffers a similar fate. The truth that we cannot be Christ for anyone, including our children, spouses, friends, etc was swirling through the room. We are inadequate.

You are inadequate.

We are going to fail over and over again and it’s ok. It is all part of God’s plan. He causes all things to work together for good for those who love Him. (Romans 8:28) And this includes our failures.  

And so the sign post that you are entering the 2^nd half of spiritual life, as Richard Rohr would call it. The sign that you are operating from within the kingdom of God as I call it is that failure is necessary. It is a necessary part of the cross and the death of ego, and the resurrection of Christ in it’s place. But failure is necessary so that we can recognize our weakness and allow Christ’s strength to come through. This is what Paul was describing in 2 Corinthians 12.

So in the context of Christ’s power being perfected failures and inadequacies are natural and necessary. It is possible to stop fighting these things. It is possible to acknowledge that I am not a perfect father because I am not a perfect reflection of Christ… all the while allowing the power of Christ to be perfected in me and be at work in all I do.

This in no way means to quit trying to be a perfect reflection of Christ. But this is to say that any of those efforts in our own ability, in our on understanding will always be inadequate. And it’s ok because God knows we are going to fail long before it ever actually happens. It’s by His design so that Christ can be lifted up.

I will close with this… if God left it up to us none of us would make it. We will always be found inadequate failures. Christ and Christ alone is adequate, and the closer you get to Him; the more you seek that relationship, the deeper into the kingdom you go and the clearer this understanding becomes. Not because you have studied a doctrine, read a book, sat under a master teacher, but because you have encountered him time and time again and found yourself lacking compared to His wisdom and beauty. He is the standard that we will never reach, and that is EXACTLY how God intended it to be. 

1st Half, 2nd Half, Whole

John 17:14-16, “I have given the Your word; and the world has hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. I do not ask You to take them out of the world, but to keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.”

Richard Rohr breaks Christian life into the 1^st half and the 2^nd half. The first half being an objective pursuit of sorts that sees defeat, failure, and tribulation causing the very necessary questioning of our Christianity. This 1^st half is succeeded by the 2^nd half where the spirit of man connects subjectively with Christ. Things that were once were objectively important to support a doctrine or dogma in the second half of (spiritual) life have lost their rigidity in working relationship to Christ.

For me I describe this sensation as entering the kingdom of God where we practice the presence of God. The 2^nd half of life is “Thy Kingdom come.” It is “Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” It is not a conquering of will, a perfecting of the art of holiness, or any other concoction of man but rather is spontaneous combustion of being in the presence of God continuously. Or at least as continuously as your spirit desires.

And so we have the 1^st half of spiritual life that begins somewhere immediate to salvation. It is an intellectual exercise. It is a practical exercise. In the 1st half of spiritual life we try to “learn” what God is and is doing so that we can somehow avoid the pain of a world full of tribulation. In the first half we try to remove ourselves from the world and transcend it effects even if only in ego. Learning leads to failure, which leads to realizing you haven’t learned enough, which leads to learning more. On and on this cycle repeats itself in the first half of spiritual life. In the first half, a life un-cognoscente of the very real kingdom of God present and at work inside. Practical exercises of spirituality are also key in the 1^st half. Go and do for God is a very appropriate and godly response as we grow in the 1^st half.

But for a few the 2^nd half of spiritual life comes into full bloom. The failures, the fallings, the challenges and trials of life are recognized as the cross of Christ coming to bear on the ego and its container the soul. Life no longer has moments to flee and others to embrace, but it all is seen as working in the constant death of self so that Christ may rise in the void.

This transition from 1^st half to 2^nd half can be seen in many people around. It is often accompanied with a distain for the 1^st half. There is a sensation that perhaps all that time spent in the first half was a waste. 1^st half institutions and 1^st half ministers are viewed with mistrust. Some go deep, deep into the 2^nd half isolating themselves from everything not spiritual. They try desperately to create an environment for themselves that is similar to the kingdom of God they experience inside. They, in essence, try to change the world. And if they cannot change the whole world, they certainly change their world. Equally 1st half'ers are guilty of the same biases in their state. To perpetual 1st half'ers the 2nd half does not exists, and the world can change if their doctrine is simply imposed on it. 

But Christ did not come to “change” the world. He did not pray, ‘God leave them here to change the world.’ Jesus did not come to create a utopia, but rather a battleground. (Matt 10:34) Christ came so that we, who are not of the world (2^nd half) could remain and live in the world. (1^st half)

I hope I have made this clear. You cannot have the 1^st half without the 2^nd half. And though our individual awareness changes in intensity as to what is more important, globally both halves are at work simultaneously.

I will describe it this way. In my Chemistry class we learned that each temperature gives off a different color of light within the ultraviolet, to infrared spectrum. White light is the combination of all the light. In other words it is all temperatures at the same time. Life with Christ is white light. It is the 1^st half, and the 2^nd half combined.

Even in the deepest recesses of the kingdom of God inside us, the body is still in the world, still benefiting from the practicality, the doctrine, and the dogma of the 1^st half. The whole is at work if you will.

And with the whole at work there is no need do anything other than to be a reflection of Christ and obedient to His light load for our individual life. I am not here to change the world, but I am here to change. 

Sabbath Rest

Van Gogh's
 "Noon rest from work after millet." 

Hebrews 4:1, “Therefore, let us fear if, while a promise remains of entering His rest, any one of you may seem to have come short of it.”

So for the past few days I have been struggling with breaking through spiritually on 2 very significant items that are causing me a lot of stress and could materially turn my world upside down for the worse. One has been since Oct, the other since Oct 2010. Yesterday I wrote on fasting in the context of breaking through. And low and behold a few hours after posting it one breakthrough came. I was finally issued my mortgage license albeit conditionally. So with at least a 6 month break before another intensive evaluation I have my last remaining major issue to see God resolve.

And as much as fasting has been on my heart, “rest” has been there as well. In the lesson of “rest” the last time I was learning to see what God does and to do that. In fact, rest was an exercise of obedience in the midst of an unemployment crisis. This time the lesson is taking a different twist.

There is a promise of “entering His rest.” This “rest” is the rest of eternal life, having been fully removed from the world and its dying affect. The rest of Hebrews 4 is not physical rest here and now, but rather a time after “They shall not enter My rest” is fulfilled. So the lesson of rest before was as physical as it was spiritual.

This time the lesson of rest is a lesson for my soul. Jesus said in Matthew 11:28-29, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” This is the rest… rest for the soul… that Jesus is telling me to enjoy. In the midst of busily working to meet physical needs, in the midst of a world full of tribulation, in the midst of a personal crisis, He is telling me “rest.” Rest your soul… do not worry… do not fret… relax.

Of this same passage in Matthew T Austin-Sparks says, “"Come unto Me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest"… What has happened? Jesus has appropriated the Sabbath to Himself. It is no longer a day of the week – it is a divine Person… No, Jesus is God's Sabbath. He is the end of God's works, and in Him God has entered into His rest. This is the "rest which remaineth for the children of God" – not a day of the week or on the calendar, but a divine Person, the Son of God. In Him we come to rest, and that which was our bondage is now our servant. In Him, that against which we were always struggling is now our victory. Oh yes, Jesus is the Sabbath, and if we live in Him we shall not spoil the Sabbath. Every day should be a day of rest to our souls. Oh, this is a mighty thing that the Lord Jesus has done!”

How powerful… “what was our bondage is now our servant.” Looming problems no longer loom in the rest, but instead serve our needs. In the rest the struggle is turned to victory.

And so having written this, and in the process of proof reading, it hits me… “Therefore, let us fear if, while a promise remains of entering His rest, any one of you may seem to have come short of it.” Short of it is not just missing heaven. Short of it is not experiencing the victory and our bondage becoming our servant in Christ as the Sabbath Rest.

That I would live this rest in my life. That I would not only understand Christ as rest, but that I would know Him as such. 

Fasting

Isaiah 56, 5-6, “Is it a fast like this which I choose, a day for a man to humble himself? Is it for bowing one’s head like a reed and for spreading out sackcloth and ashes as a bed? Will you call this a fast, even an acceptable day of the Lord? Is this not the fast which I choose, to loosen bonds of wickedness, to undo the bands of the yoke, and to let the oppressed go free and break every yoke.”

For the past several days fasting continues to come into my conversations with God. The reason being that I have two nagging, unresolved, material issues in my life that have drug on for too long without God’s intervention. I keep wondering if perhaps a fast will break the devils death grip in the areas. Or perhaps the thoughts are the Holy Spirit calling me to a fast for that very purpose.

Biblically, particularly in the Old Testament the fast served a couple of purposes. It was often used to court God’s favor, to achieve a favorable outcome like in a war or to remove unpleasant circumstances like captivity. It was also there as a part of repentance and reparations for sin.

In Isaiah there was a fast that was not affective, and it was not because the people perhaps gave up food, but nothing else changed. They continued to quench all other desires and showed no mercy to their workers during it rather than allow the fast to humble them. And so Isaiah speaks on behalf of God to define an acceptable fast. Only here it is not giving up food. The fast calls for giving up what amounts to sin, or as he calls it, “bonds of wickedness.” It sounds too like giving up addictions, or perhaps distractions when he says, “bands of the yoke… and break every yoke.”

And so my thoughts turn to times in the past where I have fasted television, video games, and other distractions for a time of prayer and being in relationship with God. After all in the American culture we have 24/7 distractions. We can wake up to TV or Radio, surf the internet from anywhere via computer, smart phone, or tablet. We wake up, we go, go go… to come home to go some more to finish the evening watching TV or surfing the internet some more. All distractions from relationship with God. All background noise so that we do not have to explore the recesses of our thoughts and soul in silence. For many, myself included, the distractions become an addiction. There are women who spend hours in romance novels and no time in the Bible. There are men who surf porn equally as long. Those things, and many others, become addictions. And it is the fast that breaks those yokes.

For me, I enjoy a glass or two of wine or an ice cold beer in the evening. But I also have to ask myself often is it too much, is it too often? Is it time for a fast of alcohol? Is it time for a fast of facebook, tv, the internet?

Sin of course should be fasted, but I have to ask myself what is the motive. Sin being anything that interferes with my relationship to Christ. Would I give up the distraction in obedience, or is my motive to court the favor of God like the men of the Old Testament? Am I only willing to loosen the band of wickedness so that God will cause me to win the lottery? And if I won the lottery, would I go back and put those bands on, or worse?

Fasting tobacco for God is a great way to start the breaking of that addiction. Fasting any addition for God is a great way to start, but when doing it for God is done, what do we become? Are we the dogs that return to their vomit?

And so I continue in my conversations with God concerning the fast, having already committed a couple of things to Him in this area. All the while guarding and questioning my heart as to its motives. Wondering if I am doing it purely to get a resolution to my material issues, or if I am doing it in an act of obedience without consideration of the outcome.

All of which I hopes causes you to consider a fast in your own life.

God Bless

God on Evolution

Genesis 1:24 & 27, “The God said, “Let the earth bring forth living creatures… Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image…”

I believe most accept evolution and never question how evolution and the Bible's version of creation work together. While on the extreme right evolution is dismissed in blind faith to the infallibility of the word of God. Does either side really look at what the Bible says?

Remember that God creates with words. Everything He says come to pass. When He says, “let there be light” there is light. And so as He continued in creation what is it God says? He says, “Let the earth bring forth living creatures…” God commands the earth to create living things. And the earth in response, by whatever mechanism… perhaps evolution brings about “everything that creeps.”

But where evolution fails is in the creation of man. Clearly there is a missing link in evolutions hypothesis about the origins of man. But God’s word is very clear. God created man Himself, and He did so using the base material of dust from the ground.

The point is that don’t let the hypothesis of evolution stand in the way of a true relationship with the Creator. For one, it is not a salvation issue to believe or not believe in evolution. Secondly, I image it will be in heaven that the exact mechanism of creation is revealed.

But if you’d like to explore the questions Science has not answered about creation and where the Bible’s version is supported by evidence then check out www.creationtoday.org as a resource.

Who is "Thou?"

Exodus 20: 4-26, “Thou shall not make for yourself an idol… Thou shall not take the Lord’s name in vain… Thou shall not murder… Thou shall not…”

Who is “Thou?” Here God gives the people of Israel what has been called the “10 Commandments.” But who is He talking to?

Consider this, everything God speaks is prophesy. In other words, everything God says comes to pass. When God says, “let there be light” there is light. If He were to say the sky is purple, then the sky would be purple. Therefore when God says, thou shall love the Lord thy God with all your heart… the thou in that sentence has no choice but to love God with all their heart. And yet we know that the people of Israel who heard these words from the mouth of God spoken out of a cloud did not love God with all their heart. They in fact, when left only a few days to their own demise created a golden calf to worship. Is God’s word not true? Is some things He speaks prophesy, and other things just wishful thinking and idle commands?

Like all of the Bible, Old & New Testament are all about Christ. Generations have missed this truth, but when God said, Thou shall not… the Thou He was talking to was Jesus. It is Christ and Christ alone who loved God with all His heart. It is Christ and Christ alone who did not murder or commit adultery in thought or deed. Christ alone is without lust and covetousness. And as a result these “Commandments” were not commandments at all. They were prophesy, the presentation of Christ even thousands of years before He came to earth in bodily form.

It is God saying… ‘Here is your standard found in My Son… Compare yourself to this.’ God says, ‘This person of Jesus Christ, in Whom He is welled pleased… this is your standard.’ And it’s a standard we will forever fail to meet while on earth in this body of death. But in relationship we are Christ like by proxy and adoption. And in relationship He comes into full view and those things in us that are not like Him begin to die and fall away.

Living Forever

2 Corinthians 5:8, “We are of good courage, I say, and prefer rather to be absent from the body and to be at home with the Lord.”

Driving into work the DJ’s on the radio got into a discussion about vampires. One said to the other that it wouldn’t be so bad to be a vampire, never aging and living forever. Immediately I thought to myself that would be terrible to live forever.

Think about it. Would you want live forever in the corruption and slow death this world is going through, only knowing God and His beauty in the spirit and in part? This is a world of tribulation and death. Sardines are born in the millions so that a few survive the ravishing of fish and fisherman alike. And though we exist on the very top of the food chain while sporting an earth suit called a body, we still suffer too by the millions. Whole continents have generations of occupants who primarily know famine and death. Billions are without freedom. This place called earth is no heaven. Quite to the contrary Jesus taught us heaven is inside us, never on the outside. And so I have to repeat what Dusty Kemp taught me years ago.

For those saved this is the only hell we will know. For those who are perishing, this is the only heaven they will know.

As for me, I don’t want to live forever. I would like to live long enough to know my children’s children, but beyond that… there is nothing special holding me to this celestial body as magnificent as it can be.

What a freedom this brings. To know, to live in a place, that at least for a moment I can say with the fullest of conviction that there is nothing on earth worth living forever for. Oh that this revelation might make me a better son, father, husband, employee… That it might make me more like Christ. That it might lead to a more abundant life as Jesus promised He would bring.

Defining the Experience

Acts 2:16, “but this is what was spoken of through the prophet Joel:”

If you break it down to the simplest explanation, what teachers do is define an experience. In Acts chapter 2 Pentecost had come and Peter is trying to define the experience in verse 16. Similarly, when a math teacher is demonstrating calculus he is doing so from an ability to articulate an experience.

For me, my purpose, my spiritual call is to proclaim the kingdom of God is at hand. That is God’s command to me. But to do this, to say that the kingdom of God is here, it is available right now I have to experience it, and thus this entire blog is born out of that experience. It is not an intellectual exercise. It is not a test of logic.

The kingdom of God is at hand so that we can be in relationship with God Himself. Do not murder no longer is a command. It is something unfathomable because of a relationship to the creator and an understanding that to do so would be in direct opposition to Him.

Some may say they are holy because of their doctrine, their dress, their ability of self control. I say that I am holy because Christ is in me and He is holy. I say that I am holy not because I am sin free but because there have been enough crises of doctrine and belief in my life to understand that those things were only there to lead me to the encounter with the True Source of holiness.

I get to a place where I believe… where my doctrine says… where finally I have discovered an absolute, only to have that absolute tested with an exception. Physical crisis, health crisis, financial crisis, relationship crisis… all there to say our faith in our beliefs is insufficient. There must be relationship. Only where we understand that our best is still contaminated, that our most complete belief is grossly inadequate do we spiritually come into the position of being able to enter the kingdom of God. Out of the confusion God is standing there with open arms saying come My child into My kingdom and sit on My lap. Let Me show you peace beyond comprehension. Let Me show you joy in the crisis.

St Augustine said this very same thing in defining his experience this way, “You were within, but I was without. You were with me, but I was not with you. So you called, you shouted, you broke through my deafness, you flared, blazed, and banished my blindness, you lavished your fragrance, and I gasped.”

Richard Rohr, a Franciscan Priest, seems to have had this very same experience. And he has articulated it this way -- calling the experience the “second half of life.” “In the second half of life, we do not have strong and final opinions about everything, every event, or most people, as much as we allow things and people to delight us, sadden us, and truly influence us. We no longer need to change or adjust other people to be happy ourselves… We have moved from doing to being to an utterly new kind of doing that flows almost organically, quietly, and by osmosis… concern is not so much to have what you love anymore, but to love what you have – right now. (Good or Bad)… Strangely, all of life’s problems, dilemmas, and difficulties are now resolved not by negativity, attack, criticism, force, or logical resolutions, but always by falling into a larger ‘brightness.’ (Surrender) Hopkins called it ‘the dearest freshness deep down things.’ This is the falling upward that we have been waiting for!”

He goes on with, “By the second half of life, you have been in regular unwelcome contact with your shadow self, (what God intends you to be) which gradually detaches you from your not-so-bright persona –stage mask in Greek—that you so diligently constructed in the first half of life. Your stage mask is not bad, evil, or necessarily egocentric; it is just not ‘true.’ It is manufactured and sustained unconsciously by your mind; but it can and will die, as all fictions must die.”

St. Augustine, Richard Rohr, a few of my friends have taken the first steps into the kingdom of heaven here on earth. Invite yourself in today. That is the only way I can say that you too can share in the experience.

I was baptized Catholic; I was raised early on Methodists. In middle school we were members of an Assembly of God church. I attended a catholic high school. And in college I started a 17 year love affair with a charismatic non-denominational church. None of which has any importance in the availability of the kingdom of God and the experience of the abiding presence of God. You do not have to be a teacher, a minister, an author, hold a title, or be affiliated with a particular denomination. All you have to do is ask to come in. All you have to do is knock.

This is not salvation. This is what salvation is for.

Will you knock on that door today? 

Second Childhood

Mark 10:15, “Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all.”

As I continue reading Richard Rohr’s “Falling Upward” I was hit with him comparing the second half of life with a second childhood. And I thought to myself, “YES… THIS GUY GETS IT.” Again, Richard calls this opening of eyes to the kingdom of God as a “second half” of life. Not that is necessarily begins half way through life, as some never experience it. But it is the place where, as he describes it as learning becomes more about unlearning.

Jesus said, “However then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 18:4). The kingdom of heaven is one and the same as the kingdom of God. And it is here right now. Therefore it is not about His kingdom coming as much as it is about our awareness of it.

The child takes the Father at face value. The child remains humble and knows that he does not know it all. The child is grateful for his Father’s forgiveness, and seeks his Father’s attention in spite of the occasional discipline. And the child always goes to the Father in a crisis. The child knows it all belongs to the Father.

There is so much about the child and the purity of heart one represents. The child is not pre-conditioned by systems. The rules of life are relatively simple. And so to is this entrance to the kingdom of God. Children see the kingdom. Children are able to practice His presence as I have often written about. But to be a child is in so many ways means to learn to unlearn.

Being a child means that we have to surrender what we know, what we’ve been taught, and who we have made ourselves to be to Christ and His lordship. Not merely in word, but in heart and deed.

Come be a child with me. Innocent, truthful, and without pretense or guile. Better yet, ask God to invite you into the freedom of childhood.

Life's Prize

Philippians 3:12-14, “Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize or the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

It was a rainy nasty weekend, and being too lazy to clean the house I purchased a book called “Falling Upward” by Richard Rohr. In it, Richard described 2 stages of life. The first stage being the longest part normally where God creates a vessel. It is here our ego is simultaneously being built, where success, security, prominence, all grow. The second stage of life is where we realize the first stage of life had little to no spiritual significance, often because our failures have challenged our beliefs sufficiently that surrender to God. (At least that is my synopsis.) And so in this second stage humility, understanding, and love emerge as God fills the vessel created in stage one.

For me this Stage 2 is the eyes open to the kingdom of God. It is coming ever so gradually into the place where Christ is preeminent, not just is word, but in the depths and fullness of my heart. Stage 2 is where the prize comes into vision.

If you read all of Philippians 3 you will see that Paul comes to the realization that all his religious efforts were “loss for the sake of Christ.” We see in this passage that the only thing that is important, the only prize that life has to offer is the opportunity and “surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus.” This is stage 2. And the paradoxical thing is that Richard Rohr basically admits the futility of the message of this stage of life, because neither he nor I can teach you to the place. It is as if you have to be invited by God Himself. But we can articulate the sanity of the insanity. We can encourage you to “press on toward the goal.”

When you get to Stage 2, when you have kingdom eyes opened, there is a clarity of how all things have been and will work together for good. All those negative experiences had just as much kingdom impact in shaping the vessel of your soul for God as all the good things. The teachings and the rules had by necessity the need to be broken for true freedom to be understood. In Stage 2 you can see that all of life is not about Christ… it is Christ. Anything less is second place.

The prize is knowing Christ and His resurrection. Not just a final resurrection but a daily resurrection from a daily bearing the cross, and a daily dying to everything that is not Him. Anything less is second best… it is to be the first looser. 

Today's music selection has nothing to do with anything... I just like the song. :-)

Holy Despair

Ephesians 3: 17-19, “…that you… may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breath and length and height, and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.”

Daily I read something from T. Austin-Sparks. This is probably because fifteen years ago his book The School of Christ was used as one of my first lessons while attending ministry school. Today, as I read that same book came full circle into my day again with the above passage.

T. Austin-Sparks (TAS) in conjunction with the Holy Spirit created in many of us a crisis of faith. When discussing the breath, length, height, and depth of Christ and His love he said, “If we live as long as ever man lived, we shall still be only on the fringe of this vast fullness that Christ is… This is not just rhetoric; this is truth. Let us ask our hearts at once, Is this true in our case?”

15 years ago a class of aspiring ministers asked in our hearts if this was true. Today again I find myself once again, is it true in my heart that I see I am only on the fringe of the vast fullness of Christ? Have I in arrogance arrived at some spiritual plateau? Have I settled that the vision I have of Christ is good enough?

TAS goes on, “Are we coming to despair on this matter? That is to say, that we are glimpsing so much as signified by Christ that we know we are beaten, that we are out of our depth, and will never range (measure) all this. It is beyond us, far beyond us, and yet we are drawn on and ever on… That is the mark of a life governed by the Holy Spirit. Christ becomes greater and greater as we go on.”

Looking back 15 years I am in awe at the depth achieved, but looking forward I am in greater awe that this relationship with Christ , this understanding of His fullness achieved so far is but a drop of water in an endless ocean.

Oh the holy desperation to know the fullness of Christ. More… is all that my heart can say.

Private Religion

Matthew 5:14-16, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.”

Christians come is so many varieties. There are some who will run barefoot through a church waiving a banner of flag in a charismatic “wholly roller” service all the way to the silent individual always sitting as far back as possible and attending limited services. There are Christians excited about their relationship and preaching and teaching to anyone who will listen, while others are only comfortable having a “private” religion. The energetic see their acts and words as being the lamp on the lampstand, while the quiet see their piety as the very same thing. And both are right if their actions are born truly in relationship to Christ. However, both can be wrong if their actions are motivated only to get or forego attention.

In the end analysis Jesus is saying with the words above that what is important is that life in the individual be a reflection of the glory of God. Pretty simply accomplished in a perfect world of perfect hearing and perfect obedience. But all is not perfect yet. So perhaps we can use this lesson to cast aside judgments of others.

The City set on the hill has nothing to do, but to be. The lamp has nothing to do, but to be. We too have nothing to “do” as a Christian. But rather we are called to “be” a reflection of Christ. Jesus said, “I am the Light of the world…” (John 8:12) And He is the light in our lamp.

The Bereans were known for studying the word of God. But being a theologian does not make a person a reflection of Christ. After all, the Bible as we know it is a relatively modern accomplishment. Prior to the printing press the Bible was limited to clergy and confined to religious institutions. In Christ' time and for dozens of years after none of the New Testament existed. Praise God that we have it today as the most published book in human history, but to know every word does not in and of itself make a person anything. Jesus said, “You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; it is these that testify about Me;” (John 5:39) This is what it is all about. Christ is the fulfillment of scripture. Christ is the light. Christ is the living water. Christ is all that matters.

So have your religion in private, or on the mountain tops, but have it with Jesus in reflection of the Christ you individually come to know. Shout from the rooftops, or walk in humble piety, but do it in obedience and emulation of Him. 

I have included Word of God Speak for a second day because it conveys this message. “I’m finding myself at a loss for words. And the funny thing is… it’s ok. The last thing I need is to be heard, but to hear… what you say.” Jesus could have said you are a bell set on the wall to warn the city. He could have said you are a horn, or any host of other noisy devices. But He did not. He said you are a lamp… He in essence said… “be”… not “do.” In being, then He is able to do. It's not what you say... it's who, and whose, you are. 

Seeing Clearly

Mark 8:25, “His eyes were opened, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly.”

My thoughts, prayers, and devotional time continue to lead me to these thoughts on healing. More specifically… that somehow we / I need healing spiritually so much more than we could possibly need physical healing. The irony of these conversations with God is that my love coach, Jim Spivey, is in the process of an excessively long recovery from a head injury. He could very much use an instantaneous touch of God’s healing hand.

Jim is a man who I and many others rely on as a mentor; and as someone with clear spiritual vision. Unfortunately he is inaccessible having been largely incapacitated. Who can we go to for spiritual vision when our coach is out of the game?

The answer is clearly Christ Himself.

Jim quoted T Austin-Sparks in his blog this morning. T said, “Engaging in the realm of God is not going to result in a refined self, a reformed self, or any other kind of patching up and repairing self. It is going to result in ‘none of self,’ and all His Son.” And not only is engaging in the realm of God going to be with none of self, but I would ad that engaging in the realm of God is going to be without someone else holding your hand to get there.

Yes we all encounter spiritual guides. Some are blind guides leading the blind. Others are full of love and vision leading the sheep. But at the end of the day God purpose is that we would individually have spiritual sight. That we each have individual relationship with Him and consequently He will be forever removing and reintroducing those who we lean on excessively for sight.

Father, help me to see clearly. Help me to act in love on that vision.

Major on the Minor

1 Corinthians 13:8-10 & 14:1, “Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away with; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away with. For we know in part and we prophesy in part; but when the perfect comes (love), the partial (gifts) will be done away… Pursue love, yet desire earnestly spiritual gifts…”

In yet another miracle of God, my second book is imminently about to hit the market. It is titled “God Heals” and a scriptural breakdown of five things that are in spiritual play in every healing. All of which is backed up by real testimonies I have witnessed God create. And even as that book is about to come out, I can’t help but wonder why we all, myself foremost of all, major on the minor. Why do we, at least in the evangelical circles, get so hung up on miracles and gifts of God?

Just the other day I read a critical commentary on the modern church because of a lack of miracles, specifically miracles of healing. And yet scratch my head, because a miracle of healing is never the end. Think about it. Lazarus died and was raised from the dead… to what end? To die again. The paralytic was healed and walked… to like us all die.

This is not to say we should not “desire” gifts of healing and of the spirit as Paul wrote. But this is to put those things in their proper order and completely second to what Christ demonstrated, namely love. “Pursue” love Paul tells us. And more, that when perfect love arrives, all the other “stuff” will be unnecessary.

This miracle of love is what I want to see in my life. Just this morning my heart was broken as I desperately need it in my life. It has been great to see blind eyes opened, and I would not change that, but what I need is to find that place where I truly love in traffic, at work, in my home… everywhere I go. I want to see the miracle of love in my everyday life and trivial tasks. That is the miracle the world is waiting for. People that know Christ and walk in His love. 

So simple, but so difficult. Think about it. What good is it to pray for the sick and see them healed if a honk in traffic is returned with a bird... or worse? What good is it to preach to hundreds, even thousands, if at home harsh words are met with harsh words? "Wretched man that I am. Who will set me free from the body of this death?" (Romans 7:24)