Awake My Soul and Love

Song of Solomon 5:2, “I was asleep but my heart was awake. A voice! My Beloved (Jesus) was knocking…”

For the past week to ten days I have had dozens, if not hundreds of reminders of my past. Wonderful memories, crazy happenings, and even of the many mistakes along the way, and for some reason this morning I looked back at my life spiritually. The gaze was incredible to look at the distance I have come since first giving my life to God 32 years ago.

I thought about how homosexuals no longer offend me in some form of enmity birthed from childhood trauma and bad teaching. Oh their lifestyle is a sin, but I feel compassion and love for them outside their lifestyle.

I thought about those following religions outside of Christianity, about those within Christianity and on paths complete different from my own. No longer is there judgment in my soul, but hope, and grace, and that same mysterious love.

I thought about religion and the vast difference of my beliefs from my Methodists beginnings, though the foundation of Christ is one and the same. God have mercy on us all as there are so many that would lead us, but I just want to be led by Christ.

In general I just reflected on how there was so much that disturbed me in years gone by that now does not bother me at all either because my trust in the Lord is becoming more complete, or because mysterious birthed inside me is a love for the people groups I once found offensive.

I marveled at the peace, which is not complete, but that I have and is increasing. Have I gone mad? Have I accepted compromise? Or is it the fruit of the Holy Spirit? Rhetorical question as I know the answer.

I marvel at the tolerance. Have I become indifferent to sin, or has judgment finally begun to flee from my soul? Am I callused from the exposure, or have I found grace and mercy and love for their souls... and mine?

I am left with feeling alive. I feel more alive than I have ever felt. Awake my soul. I was asleep, but my Beloved was knocking on my soul… “awake and love” He was saying.