The War Within

Matthew 11:12, “From the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and violent men take it by force.

At a recent meeting of Iwo Jima one of our beloved members was confronted about a perceived attitude which in fact turned out to be nothing more than apathy. Perhaps the apathy was created in part by seeing the hypocrisy of self and men, perhaps a flight from the fight that rages inside of each of us. But whatever the reason, the discussion charged Jim Spivey who asked with red face, “Don’t you know you are in a war?”

I for one know that I am in a war. But I asked Jim, what is the war?

His response was, “Jeff you of all people I expect to know what the war is.”

For me the war is with myself. For me the war is the violent way the kingdom expands inside me forcing out all that is self, demanding I crucify those things, those thoughts, that character that is not Christ, or to be crushed under the weight and storm of the expanding kingdom. Some days I war against apathy like our friend. Some days I war against greed, or lust, or power, or control. Some days I war against the war itself. But the truth is the war within is a battle we must all fight, all of the time for it is this violence; it is violently fighting for surrender that we experience and take the kingdom of God.

Of the experience Jim wrote, “I battled yesterday, again, in a battle that couldn't be won, unless, of course, I could choose to lose.  The battle was not external.  This is an inner revolution.  The battle was and is to be ALL of me - as He made me, which ultimately is His Son at the very core - in the face of the world’s required and relentless resistance.  It is a losing proposition, either until victory (through choosing defeat) or death (through avoiding it).  Through “pushing against the rock,” as we’ve been told (because we all have our immovable rocks), we grow and mature.”

We have another friend that feels like he is supposed to sell everything, buy some sort of RV and spend a year traveling the country with his wife and two children. The caveat is that selling everything probably means having enough money for the RV, and a tank of gas, not the money to travel worry free. He shared the fear he has in obeying this godly compulsion.

The first thing that popped into my mind was, “what will he do for God as He travels?” And then as suddenly as my flesh asked the question the Spirit says, “what does that matter if I have told him to go?” If he does nothing but travel nothing matters if it is in obedience to God. Because the journey is the point. The battle is inside him, there is nothing “out there” to go and do. There is no more important fight for God than our own daily fight to bring our soul in alignment with the Spirit of God. So to our friend I say, “God Bless you.” Even to have the thought is more faith than I have.

All of which gives new meaning to what Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 10:5, “We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ,” Where is your knowledge of God? Where are your thoughts? That is where the war is. Won’t you join us in the battle?

Winning

Matthew 5:39, "But I say to you, do not resist an evil person; but whoever slaps you on the right cheek, turn the other to him also.

No sooner had I posted yesterday my disappointment on the results of my obedience, and I opened this from Jim Spivey's blog.

Jim wrote, "I don’t ever get to 'win' at this following His direction thing (and my ego so wants to win and get it all right); no, I will lose, again and again, and He wins for me, giving me more than I ever even knew I wanted."

What happened at the birth of Jesus that changed the nature of following God? Why does the entrance of a messiah make the godly go from smiter to smited? I want to win. I want to smite evil. I want to crush injustice. And yet the New Testament runs in an apparent polar opposite to the Old Testament. Why?

This is largely because the Old Testament is the story of the godly without the Holy Spirit, and without direct access to the Father, and without knowledge of the kingdom of God. Everything therefore became a metaphoric expression of the spiritual. It all was prophetic of the appearance of Jesus on the earth.

Post Christ however, there is the availability of the Holy Spirit. There is entrance into the kingdom of God, and therefore all that is physical becomes irrelevant. In Christianity winning comes from obedience to that Holy Spirit. It is doing that right thing when you know to do it. It is following that compulsion to step out of your comfort zone, and be a reflection of Christ and His love for someone. Then, the prosperity of the Old Testament will be prosperity in Heaven. After all, Heaven is where Jesus said to store up your wealth.

To the world, Charlie Sheen has as good a definition of winning as anyone. But in Christ, winning only comes from obeying by letting go of our will, and following His.

Death... a beautiful thing!

Philippians 3:10-12, "That I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death... not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on that I may lay hold of (it)..."

I cannot get this scripture out of my mind, and the completeness it represents. It is perhaps a great summary of this entire blog to this point. At the same time it so richly speaks of the Christian experience, or if you prefer, the Christian experiment. Life as a Christian, with its trials and tribulation is the daily crucifixion of our egos, of everything that is not God or Christ like. Likewise, in the absence of tribulation, the very act of love requires the same self denial, the same crucifixion if you will, of our ego. After all, ego will always stand in the way of loving an enemy or any other unlovable. Therefore it must die.

This passage is encouraging. Here the apostle Paul writes the Philippians in shameless surrender to confess he has not arrived. "Not that I have already obtained" tells us that there is an infinitely long path after salvation in the direction of perfection. Knowing full well perfection will not be achieved in this lifetime. This is comforting to me. Beyond comfort, the concept is inspiring. It inspires me to lay aside judgments because the only thing important is the path, not the place on the path.

Though this passage is not explicit in the role death of self plays in entering the kingdom of God in this life, it is a confirmation none the less. Allowing self, ego, to die opens us up to experiencing the kingdom of God from the inside and on our inside. At the end of ourselves is where we begin to see with God's perspective.

One of the other great reminders this scripture provides is that if you are in Christ, then you must also share in His death. This is not a physical death, but a spiritual one. As a result when we see someone going through this process, we know it is not our responsibility to rescue. But rather our responsibility to jump in the mire with them. To help them see the end, to find the door to the other side. To walk with them through the eye of the needle into the kingdom of God. All the while listening to God and obeying His commands.

Having said all of that I must make the point that we know for certain that all tribulation is not part of dying. It could very well be a trap, or a test from Satan. One would not want to jump into Satan's trap with someone else, thus we must hear from God to know when to rescue, when to co-exists with, and when to run.

Because of the joy set before Him, Christ endured the cross. There is a beauty on the other side of the death of self. It is a step closer to God. It is a greater experience of His love. It is an opening of heaven and increased communication with the Father. Because of this, and every other thing contained in "joy" death is a beautiful thing.

Kingdom Observation

Matthew 11:7-9, "...Jesus began to speak to the crowds about John, 'What did you go out into the wilderness and see? A reed shaken by the wind? But what did you go out and see? A man dressed in soft clothing?... But what did you go out to see? A prophet?..."

Recently my parents were given a house full of furniture in lieu of rent. From the picture, and at a distance everything looked really nice. Upon closer inspection; in the arms of us movers, and under the scrutiny of sweat, it was not as nice as seen from the pictures.

In comes the Holy Spirit and we all hear something very similar in our spirits... What is wrong with this picture?

For my mom the furniture was representative of the worldly principle of looking good on the outside, but that close inspection reveals a different more damaged perspective. Guess you could call it a lesson that things are not always as they appear.

For me I thought, wow these people took some stuff that was average and made it look spectacular. They made the most of the gift God had given them. On top of that had no physical attachment to it, but were rather people of honor trying to fulfill their obligation anyway possible.

I asked God why the different perspectives between two people who love you? What can be observed from inside the kingdom of God? Not just the outside hearing the Holy Spirit saying something is wrong. The answer I got was surprising.

When you are observing from inside the kingdom of God the only thing wrong with the picture is you. Everything else is perfect.

How many times has the Holy Spirit asked you, what is wrong with this picture? How many times have you assumed you knew what was wrong? How many times have you thought the answer was you? I am not a psychologists, but I know that contained in our judgements of others is always a judgment of ourselves. This thought gives new meaning to judge not lest you be judged. It is our judgments that judge ourselves. Said another way, our judgements are about ourselves, we only broadcast them onto others.

The people of Jesus' time went to the wilderness expecting to see one thing, and they got John the Baptist. So to we go to the kingdom of God in prayer, expecting to see one thing. Expecting have our will imposed on the earth. Expecting to see what is wrong with everyone and everything else. But what we get is God's perfection while our expectations (judgments) only reveal our own weaknesses and flaws.

I saw something in the people's giving up the furniture not present in myself, a godly trait I don't have. I saw people willing to let go. Others may see something that is present. Regardless, remember that in the kingdom of God we are the problem. We are the ones with the logs in our own eyes. From that perspective we are more inclined to judge correctly.

Kingdom Eyes

2 Timothy 2:7, "Consider what I say, for the Lord will give you understanding in everything."

Most Christians of all denominations and faith acknowledge the Holy Spirit to one degree or another. They accept that He is our helper and guide, and know that sometimes our thoughts are not our own, but placed there by the Holy Spirit. This gives us a counter voice to the voice of the world. What I would propose is that if the Holy Spirit is our facilitator to hearing God, then the kingdom of God is our facilitator to seeing.

Sounds a bit like herasy, but follow me on this one. God is light. Light is energy and mass. God is, and His light emits from Him. Where that light goes is His kingdom. The Holy Spirit operates not only in the kingdom, but beyond it's borders to call people out of the darkness. Darkness is the absense of light, and thus to be outside the kingdom of God. With me so far?

Now scripture can be read with the help of the Holy Spirit. Take for example the parable of the talents. The master gives the slaves talents (6000 days wages) expecting them to invest the money. Upon the master's return he comes to collect. The ones who grew the talents were rewarded. The ones who did nothing had it taken away. With the Holy Spirit we know talents are not just money. With the Holy Spirit we know that the master is the Master, namely Jesus Christ. Now let's open our eyes. Let's look at the scripture from inside the kingdom.

Inside the kingdom we know everything is spiritual. Therefore we know that the talents are nothing earthly. The talent may be mercy, patience, giving, comforting, understanding... anything that is a character of God, or anything that God can imagine. It is not money, education, intellect. For me, God has said my talent is shameless surrender. Therefore it is my obligation, under the kingdom principle to not only use that talent, but use it in such a way that it grows. That others learn or recognize it in themselves.

Don't believe me? Look at Matthew 19:24. Jesus says, "Again I say to you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." Again, with kingdom Eyes... where is the rich man going? To the kingdom of God... not a place in the future, but a place here and now. A place that fills us as we enter. And again because the kingdom of God is spiritual we know that a rich person is not only monetary wealth. Riches are anything in abundance that we rely on more than God. Again it can be intellect, education, training... anything. You see the eye of a needle was a physical place. It was in the gate of a khan at Nazareth. It was intended for foot traffic, but for a camel to go through it must be unpacked of its load.  So too a man that relies on the earthy treasures must be unpacked before entering and understanding this kingdom of God principle. The more education you have, the harder it is to unpack. The more money you have the harder it is to unpack.Once on the other side the camel maybe reloaded. God may have us pick up and use the natural talents and gifts, but only after them being laid down. Just like Abraham laid down Isaac.

I have a lot of financial training. I am in a financial crisis because God is helping me unpack all that physical training and education so that I can enter through the eye of the needle into the kingdom of God where I will see and understand Him as my Provider and Provision.

I will close with something from my sight coach Jim Spivey, "What I “see,” thanks to Him, I can sometimes have a hard time convincing other people of, because it is not readily “apparent.”  The only “place” from which I will desperately struggle to do so is the place that has lost touch with His vision.  Clear and in direct contact, there is no drama, for the answer He gave one, He gave all, and it is not my job to manipulate, force, or control access.  It is my job to simply point to the door and invite entry."

Kingdom Come

Luke 17: 20-21, "...the Kingdom of God is not coming with signs to be observed; nor will they say, 'Look here it is!', or "there it is!' For behold the kingdom of God is in you midst." (inside you or within you)

I could post the 2 or 3 lessons leading to this point, but why not just go straight for the desert. Besides that is what everyone really wants anyway. However, before we get there I must preface by saying what I am about to write I have never heard before. In fact I do not have a theological or doctrinal basis for it.

God puts pastors and ministers in my path. As of late, some to learn from, but most to listen to and love on. One thing that I have noticed about the pastors God puts in my path is that they are all by in large in the same financial position of struggle as me. God knows the lessons He is teaching us in this, but I encountered a pastor the other day who is not financially struggling. To me He is an anomaly and in fact knows even more pastors and ministers who are struggling financially. And perhaps struggle is not a good word. Let's say these pastor are provided with just enough. That is a fair assessment of where God has them.

So this comfortable pastor explains that he feels guilty for not having to struggle financially. After all these men have well known ministries, and are considered great men of God. So I see the warped logic of, if a superior is struggling, then why shouldn't he. The following is what I said.

First I really don't see many people struggling like Job where they are attacked in finances, health, and relationships. Reality is the trials of life seem to come in one of those three areas. And they come to everyone. For the comfortable pastor above, his life's challenges are a constant health battle in his family. For others that I know-- they have secure finances, perfect health, but a relationship out of control. If a parent, the relationship is usually a child. All these trials are being used to prove that we are incapable, and that God is bigger than us. They are there for us to surrender to God. The end result being we love each other more.

One of these struggling pastors that I was talking with, like me, lost his business. He also lost his church and everything he owned. Two years ago he had a heart attack at 64 followed by 4 strokes. He has been recovering since, but his health caused the financial demise. Currently his wife has stage 4 cancer in both breast, but he keeps trudging on for God. He is a non-stop flowing fountain of God's word. Including what we all know to be prosperity preaching. And this is where I had to part with him in beliefs.

Here is where my THOUGHTS come in. Again, these are thoughts.

Yes I believe God is a God of restoration. But I also know that Abraham, the father of faith, never saw the promise. He did not see the promise while alive on earth because God was teaching that faith sees the rewards in heaven and earthly rewards are inconsequential.

I don't think God gives a crap about money. He does not care if you have it, and He does not care if you don't have. If you have it and He does not want you to have it, He will take it away. If you don't have it and He wants you to have it, you will. And here is why. Here is how all that prosperity preaching is correct and wrong in the context of money at the same time.

From the fall of Adam to John the Baptist relationship with God was broken. The only communication that God had with the common man was the law and through the physical word. Do good, get money was a type and shadow of what the spiritual world is like. The spiritual world is obey God and get a reward, in heaven. The passover dinner... prophetic type and shadow of what occurred on the cross in the spirit world. I have countless examples.

So here comes Jesus. What did He come preaching? Repent the kingdom of God is at hand. Somewhere over 70 times He mentioned this. This kingdom came with Christ's resurrection and the introduction of the Holy Spirit to the world. (Thy Kingdom Come, thy will be done on earth as in heaven) From that point on the physical was irrelevant, and the spiritual is where the importance and the lesson is. Think about the Pharisees. They were complaining the disciples didn't wash before eating. Jesus commented that the Pharisees clean the outside but not the inside. He was not talking about the cup. He was talking about the person. Luke 17: 20-21 is this transition. It is the expression of going from the law (physical) to grace (spiritual). Yes the physical can mirror the spiritual, but at the same time this is not absolute. Because someone has or does not have money is in no way an indication of their spiritual condition. Peace, patience, understanding... LOVE... these are the true indicators.

And there is nothing or no one better at love than God. If something is standing in the way of that love, be it love of money, love of self, love of relationships... anything, God will remove it so that His love for you can be clearly manifested.